The Waiting Process

By Julia Diamond
May 4, 2020

The adoption process can be long and tedious for adoptive couples, that’s no secret. But when you’ve finally crossed the last T and dotted that last I, the next step is “the Big Wait.” You find yourself with lots of free time and a lot of time to dwell on all the things that could go wrong and why the heck it’s taking so long to be matched.

Many of our adoptive couples have asked us, “what can we do to help alleviate some of this anxiety, especially when we’re quarantined in our house due to COVID-19?” Well, here are some tips from our team.

Spend Time Together

Take advantage of this time together because after you adopt everything will change (in a positive way, of course!). Have date nights at home. Watch movies that YOU want to watch. Enjoy quiet bonfires and barbecues in the backyard. Sleep in! Once you adopt, the house won’t be as quiet and you’re more likely to be watching lots of Disney movies.

Talk with Friends and Loved Ones

Sometimes, we dump too much onto our significant others. So, it’s always helpful to have someone besides your spouse to lean-on during times like these. Of course, you won’t be able to spend time together in-person during “shelter-in-place,” but you can always have Skype, FaceTime, or Zoom hangouts. You can also meet/talk with people online who have gone through the adoption process too. There are some great forums and social media groups just for this purpose.

Take Care of Your Mind and Body

The moment you bring a baby into your home, life is going to get a lot more stressful. That just comes with the territory of being a parent! You’re going to be up in the middle of the night doing feedings, changing diapers every 2-3 hours, running around the house chasing the kid – all while juggling the rest of your life too. So, take some time before you adopt to establish some self-care routines, such as exercise and mindfulness regiments. Getting yourself into a wellness routine now will go a long way in ensuring that you keep it up once you adopt.

Broaden Your Culinary Horizon

Kids are picky eaters, that’s just the truth. So, while you’re waiting to adopt, take advantage of your culinary freedom. Even though you may be stuck at home, you can still broaden your culinary horizons and try out some new recipes. Consider taking a free online cooking class, opening up some of those cookbooks you’ve never used before, or finding some good recipes online (we’re big fans of recipes or NYT Cooking (subscription required, but well worth it).

Pick up a Good Book

We know that you’re probably tired of reading after having gone through mountains of paperwork for your adoption, but there is no better time than now to read a good book. Whether it’s a romance novel, a page-turning thriller, or a good parenting book – don’t hesitate to open it up. If you’re looking for a good book on adoption, here is a good list that we recommend.

While it’s easier said than done, just remember that waiting is the next step toward uniting with your child. Better times are soon to come.